Taco is a synonym of sexy. Y U so taco?

Hi everybody. Or just you, person who is reading this. This blog entry is specially for you, just so you know. (don't tell everybody else).

So, Mexico, yeah. What's happening here? Well, it was Mexican Independence Day a couple weeks ago . . . it's one of the biggest, craziest happenings of the year in Mexico, especially here in the capitol. Approximately 8 million people gather in the city's center square, the Zocalo, for the "grito" (which translates as "the yell," or something like that.). The president Felipe Calderón comes out on the balcony of the big government headquarters there and yells (so it's not just a clever name) "¡Viva México!" and "¡Viva la Republica!" and "¡Tacos for all!" Everything except that last one. I wish though. Mmmm tacos.

Actually, tacos are quite the conundrum here in Mexico City. Your pitiful, arrogantly misinformed American version of tacos, with crunchy yellow shells or white flour tortillas, ground beef and lettuce and yellow cheese . . . it has no representation here. Tacos are pretty much exclusively served on corn tortillas, and can have a very wide variety of things put into them. Not excluding birds, dustbusters, and country ham. That's where the quandary begins. There are SO SO SO many streetside taco vendors. I mean, on the way to the subway from my house, i pass a row of about 10-15 taco booths. Some are also making ham sandwiches, soup, frying a big cauldron of pork, stirring it with a huge wooden fork like the grandma doing the laundry in the old Willy Wonka movie.

That's just the thing though. In USA, a streetside vendor, while very scarce, probably has the bomb homemade deliciousness. I fondly recall my Tamale Cart near the King Soopers in Golden, and many random Elk and Buffalo Jerky stops up Clear Creek or down in the SW of the state.

Thing is, those streetside vendors here in Mexico . . . ugh, you don't want to know how they are making that food, where they've been keeping that meat, what they're touching in succession. Seriously, it's like, a huge opaque bucket full of random meats, just sitting getting attacked by flys, open, next to this booth slangin' tacos. And they've got trays of some seriously gross looking shit that you can watch people eat in awestruck disgust. Weird black meatballs, porkfat in green sauce with hardboiled egg . . . yummy. One of my bosses, Paco, an extremely nice short mexican guy, got Salmonella from eating tacos just down the road from the office, spent 4 days in the hospital. And he's from here.

But, what's a guy to do? Tacos are not getting any less delicious, and I'm not getting any less antsy in my pantsy to eat me some. You just have to pick your taco providers carefully. There are little hole-in-the-wall restaurants that are more or less exclusively taco joints. At least they have a refridgerator in the restaurant, good lord. My friend Carina tried to take me to a market down the street from work to eat grody street tacos 3 DAYS before my female compatriot Elizabeth was coming to visit. What a hobag. Ovary punching to follow.

So to answer your question of what I personally did for the Mexican Independence celebration, the answer is nothing. I stayed in Condesa, made a little dinner, relaxed with a tequila bandera i personally made myself, and did not hit up the festivities. Why am I such a boner-in-the-mud, you ask? Well, the prior weekend I had a relatively rough go of it, some things happened that I had never been party to before, and it honestly shook me, pretty bad. I won't go into details here, many of you may have received phone calls from me that night, anybody else, feel free to email me to get the full scoop. It was not pleasant, and thus I stayed nice and safe on the night when everybody gets hammacher-schlemmered and drives around and shoots guns in the air from their car windows.

So yeah, Elizabeth did end up coming, we had a fabulous time, I think I have her mostly convinced to come and stay with me after she graduates in December. It's just kind of a toss up over whether we should try to get her a Visa (I still don't have MINE) or just let it ride, try to get her like a part-time job, get a dog, who knows. All I'm concerned with is getting her here and keeping her safe and happy with me during our ex-pat tenure (in this country, anyway. it certainly won't be the last.).

I am basically just used to my Sally McScreamsalot neighbor girl, as you may have read about in the last post. Which is good, because I invariably see her mom in the building elevator 10x more than i see anyone else, so if I was being an a-hole about it, that would probably be way more uncomfortable than it already is.

Ho man, did you read the new Harry Potter yet? I had a friend (internet friend) send me their copy to borrow and read from the US, I just had to reimburse her for postage. Best $9.00 Elizabeth ever spent on me, I tell you what. Although I was disappointingly done in like 2.5 days. Much like college, i should have dragged it out longer.

So, I guess that's about it, I've got couches and chairs in my house now, still no table to speak of (for eating at and such). There's the Pub Trivia tonight at the local english-speaking bar, The Black Horse. The last pub quiz they had was won by yours truly and a couple friends, the prize was a bottle of jack daniel's, on the spot, which we promptly emptied with the help of the hosts and a couple other friends. Not bad, i'm not sure if i'll play this evening though. Since the US Dollar plunged into what the French call le shitter this week, I have been trying to avoid spending or taking out money until it goes back up. taking 3000 pesos out of the bank last week cost me about $240 bucks, this week it's $280. Stupid George Bush. Worst person ever. I hope that guy bangs the ungodly fuck out of one of his shins on his presidential coffee table. Assface.

Well, I certainly can't end this post on such a negative note, so let me ruminate about what to leave you with . . . I have an herb garden growing in my house, I have peppermint (hierbabuena), rosemary (romero), oregano (oregano - look how you already know so much spanish!) and basil (albahaca). Also I think i'm going to build myself a coffee table out of a piece of glass and some old books. I got some good suggestions from friends like Ryan, Carrie, and Krista, but unfortunately i wasn't able to bring my table saw and t-square on the plane ride down with me, so i won't be able to utilize the designs you sent. The attention was appreciated though.

I'm still planning on definitely coming home for Christmas, and perhaps trying to squeeze in Thanksgiving if at all possible, so please start reserving Golden City IPA 5-gals and sexy transgender strippers post-haste. I appreciate that.

Okay, that's good, hope everybody has a very spectacular fall ahead of them. Be in touch, email me and i can give you my address so you can send me pictures, letters, and gift certificates to American establishments which I will clearly never be able to use before the expiration date. That's what I'd do, anyway.

So, who's coming to visit??????